I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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