I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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