I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
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