This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
he's gonorrhea incarnate
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
