my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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