Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
