Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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