i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
