You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Randomize
