He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
