he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
