She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Dignity is for republicans.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Randomize
