i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
