i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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