My Higher Power is John Stamos
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Randomize
