I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
