Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
