you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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