haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
