Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
