I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Randomize
