: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Randomize
