Will you blow on my dice?
Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Your dad touched me again.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Randomize