Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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