she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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