all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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