I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
We were destined to go to rehab together
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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