His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
my poor anus
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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