He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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