You can't motorboat a personality
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Randomize
