Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
