it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize