we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
