Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
youre lurking in front of me
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
We named our party play list daddy issues
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Randomize