ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
