singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize
