Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
barbara walters just said penis...
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
