Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I have post one night stand depression
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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