Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Randomize
