That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize