belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
someone get that fucking seahorse.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize