she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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