So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
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