I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
