I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Randomize
