I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
