their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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