dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
