Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Randomize
