I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
