I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
